Support
As victims/survivors we need
support in many ways. This can be personal support as from friends, partners,
non offending family, fellow survivors and counsellors. It can be informational
support in terms of obtaining appropriate, clear and honest information. It can
be financial support and assistance with housing, education,
etc.
What is Good Support
Good support generally is
one that is clear, honest, full, informative, non judgemental, non intrusive,
empathetic, provides options, and overall assists the victim/survivor to be
independent and have control over their life.
Personal
Support
This can be personal support
as from friends, partners, non offending family, doctors, fellow survivors and
counsellors. Good support is being consistent, reliable, honest, empathetic, non
judgemental and caring. A good supporter provides information, gives honest,
caring feedback and assists the victim/survivor’s independence. Personal
supporters, like ourselves and people generally, also have limitations in terms
of caring and time.
This is support that provides information
that is important to the victim/survivor. It maybe Social
Security information, housing, welfare, counselling services, avenues of
ombudsman investigation, etc. What is important is that the full
information is clear, is written in everyday language (if not, ask for a
translation), provides options, and is consistent.
I have had to deal a lot with social
security, the police and other government departments and have not had problems.
With Social Security, I have found that I get better service by seeing a social
worker or counsellor. They are generally more sympathetic than counter staff as
they can take their time in explaining things and providing
options.
With housing, travel and other forms of
assistance each state differs with the amount and types. Talk to a social
worker, at Social Security or a hospital, community centre, etc for the full
information about what that state provides.
The Police and other government bodies may
also be obviously triggering. If you unsure about approaching the police, ask
your counsellor if s/he can go with you. Also s/he may know of a sympathetic
policeperson.
If you feel that any of these aspects are not happening
with any of your supporters, question them in clear ways. Too much anger,
suspicion or aggression doesn’t work well as it means that they will be less
likely to assist you. Suspicion or being reminded of past abuse isnt a clear
fact that these people are perpetrators. As with all types of abuse we need to
get clear facts of not being supported.